Let's Talk Fashion

After a fun-filled, jam-packed, last weekend of summer break, the kids and I made the trek back to North Jersey to make final preparations for my first day of school.  I've spent the afternoon attempting to tie up loose ends, but images of my less-than-desirable wardrobe keep forcing their way into my brain.  What does a thirty-something mother of two wear to college?  I want to say it doesn't matter to me what others think...but let's be honest, it always matters to some extent.  I've never been one to go with the flow when it comes to fashion, but I want to feel good about myself as I make this journey.  I have fallen somewhat into the trap that many young mother's fall into over the years.  My appearance has taken a back seat to the business of motherhood.  I can generally pull something together for a special occasion that I feel ok about, but the day-to-day is always tough for me.  I just don't spend money on myself.  I recently purged my wardrobe (among the many things I've donated this summer) and am left with little that I love.  Now that I've purged, I feel an overwhelming desire to replace the old with new and fabulous.  Herein lies the dilemma.  With no money in the budget for a back-to-school makeover for Mom, I have to pull from what I have.  Being the same age of several professors, I find myself wanting to look a bit more professional so as to not feel like a total loser in their presence.  On the other hand, I will be spending most of my time with classmates 10-15 years my junior.  I'm not looking to make friends, but I don't want to be the dorky old lady no one wants to talk to, either.  How do I strike the perfect balance between professional Mom and undergrad student?  Let me know your ideas of the ideal first day of school outfit for this Mom on a Mission: )  Any thrifty people out there with suggestions on how to stretch a buck when creating a wardrobe?  Any crafty mama's know how to make something new and fantastic out of something old and drab?  Let's talk fashion!

Snacks

We do not partake in processed foods.  Our children cannot eat any grains.  We do not consume sugar or additives of any sort.  For the most part, I have adjusted and can easily create meals around our diet.  The problem is always snacks!  With school coming closer, I am going to great lengths to create lunch box friendly snacks that my kids won't be embarrassed to eat at school.  There's always fruit, but they get tired of it and quite frankly, I don't want them constantly eating sweet things for snack.  So far, our newest additions to the snack rotation for school this year are roasted chick peas (they are crunchy) and crispy cheese chips.

Roasted Chick Peas:
soak 2 cups chick peas in water with a tablespoon of sea salt over night
drain chick peas
toss them with avocado oil until lightly coated (you can substitute any oil)
sprinkle to taste (I find it's best to be quite generous with the seasonings) with sea salt and whatever seasonings appeal to you -  we like garlic powder, paprika, chili powder (tossing in tamari is good, too)
bake in a single layer in a preheated oven at 350 degrees for about an hour
cool completely and store in air tight container

(the timing of these can be tricky - they will still feel a bit soft in the middle when they're hot.  after they cool, they will be crunchy.  If you wait for them to be crunchy all the way through, upon cooling they will break  your teeth: )

Crispy Cheese Chips:
preheat oven to 350 degrees
grate mild cheddar cheese
place in little piles on a pizza stone and sprinkle with dried basil and garlic powder (plains is fine, too)
bake for 10 - 15 mins
cool on paper towels
store in air tight container

Anyone else have any recipes to share?  I'm always on the lookout for new snacks!

lessons on the skating rink floor

I was a competitive figure roller skater from the ripe old age of 2 until around 5. (dramatic pause)  The best part about that line is you think I'm joking...I'm not.  I really did roller skate competitively.  I have pictures to prove it for those who remain skeptical: )  Today, we went to the skating rink.  My 9 year old has only been once before and this was the first for my 3 year old.  I LOVE to skate.  I love to feel the wind in my hair and just go.  Now, my children have apparently not been blessed with my "gift" of ease on wheels.  It was a test of patience to go around that rink at a snails pace with them, falling every 2 seconds.  The big one seemed to be angry about the fact that he couldn't just take off...instead he clung to the wall.  Have you ever watched someone struggle on roller skates?  I realized today - they always move their feet too fast.  It's this crazy, back and forth motion, arms flailing as they desperately try to find balance.  Today's epiphany: if you want to go fast on roller skates, you have to move slowly.  The skating lesson I gave my son was to find his center, concentrate on where he wanted to go, and move his feet in a slow, but controlled way.  As he did this, he found himself moving farther, faster.  He's no expert, but he's making progress.  I often feel discouraged about the lack of forward motion in my life.  Do you ever find yourself flailing and shuffling, trying to find balance, to move ahead, moving your "feet" too fast?  Life is like roller skating!  Find your center, focus on where you want to go, and move yourself in a slow, but controlled way.  Before you know it, you'll be flying around the rink of life; )  Please pardon the extreme cheesiness of this post.  My excuse?  2 hours of sleep last night, a 3 hour drive today, plus 3 hrs of roller skating, followed by a bridal shower.  Wonder how I'll feel about this after a good night's sleep?

The Cleaning Ritual

I hate cleaning.  I make no apologies.  It's not my thing.  I reluctantly do my best to keep up with day to day housework.  I do laundry and dishes several times daily.  I attempt to pick things up at the end of the day.  Somehow, the place inevitably ends up looking like a war zone.  I've tried enlisting the help of my children.  A daily chore chart, which has worked wonders, has been helpful.  However, I just can't manage to stay on top of it.  So, any time someone is coming over, I spend a frantic day doing the cleaning ritual.  I learned it from my mother.  The house must be spotless before any guests arrive.  I start at one end and clean like a madwoman to the other end of the house.  I neglect my children for most of this day ~ movies, books, ANYTHING to keep them out of my way.  Today was one of those days.  We are not having any type of exciting house guest.  The babysitter is coming.  Yes, the grownups are having a night out on the town!  The prospect of this would be much more exciting had I not exhausted myself for 9 hours today scrubbing the place down.  Is it really necessary for me to do this just because a babysitter will be here?  I tried to tell myself I was not doing it merely for the babysitter.  School starts next week, the kids and I are going away for our last summer hurrah this weekend, and I want to be clean and organized when we return.  This is true, but had the babysitter not been looming on the horizon, I would not have gone so far.  I was just thinking...in two weeks, I will have a babysitter in the house 2 days a week!  Does this mean I have to do the cleaning ritual twice every week?  Is it possible I'll be able to keep the clutter at bay, knowing there will be a regular visitor?  Does it matter as much as I think it matters?  I think I need help!  So, tell me...what do you do?  Do you have a cleaning ritual?  Are you one of "those" people who's home is ALWAYS spotless?  What's your secret?  Do you allow visitors in your clutter?  ENLIGHTEN ME, people!  I need it.     

Donating Things That Don't Belong to Me...Oops

We moved into our apartment in the fabulous Montclair, NJ about 6 months ago.  This is the first time we've been in an apartment (not a house) in 6 years.  It is all part of the finishing school plan - downsizing goes along with it.  We have a great place but it is SMALL!  We sold all our big things and replaced them with little things from Ikea.  It was freeing in a way.  It quickly became clear that we still have TOO MUCH STUFF!  So, it's become a project.  I've sold many a priceless possession for far less than it's worth on Craiglist.  We've been donating things left and right; anything not nailed down ~ look out!  On Tuesday, the kids and I donated a large box of books to the library.  The box has been sitting here for over a month.  Little by little, we've added to it.  As I was handing the box over, my son grabbed a book off the top and said, "isn't this Daddy's".  It WAS Daddy's, but Daddy had told me we could donate it.  The boy insisted, "are you sure?"  Of course I was sure...what kind of person donates things that don't belong to them?  Cut to this morning, Thursday...my husband is searching all over the book shelf and around the house.  He looks forlorn.  "Have you seen my book, 'Design Patterns'?"  Why yes, yes I have.  I gave it to the library on Tuesday...the sinking feeling in my stomach left me squirming in his gaze.  He looked confused and somewhat shocked...I'm not sure if he even believed me at first.  So, I swallowed my pride and did the unthinkable...I went back to the library and told them I needed my donation back: )  I was escorted into a back room stacked on all sides with books - tables piled 30 deep - boxes on the floor - SO MANY BOOKS!  The kids and I began searching, but to no avail.  Interestingly, I didn't see any of the books we had given.  I was told to look on the sale racks where they sell the books not suitable for shelving to raise money for the library.  Not one of our books graced these shelves.  "I guess it's been sold then." she told me.  Sold for $1!  My husband's $50, almost new book that he needs for his work was sold for $1!!!!  Not to mention every single other book we donated - apparently sold, as well.  In 2 days, they sorted, shelved, and sold them all!  That's impressive.  I, on the other hand, hang my head in shame and vow to check, recheck, triple check before I get rid of something that doesn't belong to me in the future.     

Taking Care of Business Day

There's much to be done as summer is coming to an end, school is looming around the corner, and my business is trying to get off the ground.  A slow start this morning, I mustered some inner strength from the depths of my being and proclaimed the day, "Taking Care of Business Day".  Do I see a national holiday in the future?   It was a day of running errands and accomplishing many tasks, which means dragging the kids all over town.  In order to get them on my side after my proclamation, I lead them in a rousing game of "Simon Says".  With a good dose of exercise (disguised as a game) and a long list in tow, we set out.  We purchased a thermos for the little one's lunch box - this is not as simple as it sounds.  Had to be double-wall insulated, high grade stainless steal, lead free, pthalate free, BPA free, aluminum free, etc.  (insert eye roll from many of you here)  It also had to be shallow enough for my preschooler to get her little bamboo spork into AND meet her approval.  Purchased it a Go Lightly in Montclair - great little shop!  The rest of the day we spent filling out paperwork and taking it to the little one's pre-K, filming two scenes of a little film the kids and I are making for a contest, purchasing some school supplies at the Montclair State Bookstore, doing a little food shopping at Whole Foods, planting a tree in the park (no kidding - we did!), washing 4 loads of laundry, cooking three meals (all from scratch), and some other random household chores.  I have to say, the young-ins were troopers until about 4:00pm.  The rest of the night was a whirlwind of craziness - the kind of craziness that makes a Mom's head spin!  He pushed me, she kicked me, he's bossing me around, she's yelling at me...ahh!  I thought about locking myself in my room with a good book or something (who am I kidding, it would be a pint of Ben and Jerry's I'd escape with), but instead I put on my best "Taking Care of Business Day" face and I took care of business.

Why a blog?

I used to write. All day, every day. I have journal upon journal filled with the musings of a quirky, artsy, deeply feeling young woman. Upon the birth of my first child in 2000, the entries became less and less. I could barely muster the words to create a shopping list. For the past 10 years, I have been moving in so many directions, caring for my 2 children and my husband, trying to keep myself creative. An actor/singer by trade, I never really intended to give up on my "career" to raise my children. I thought I could have it all. It worked for a little while. But, when child number 1's anxiety disorders took up residence in our home, I realized it was time for me to let go of my own dreams in order to pave the way for the dreams of my children. I've worked from time to time. I could probably count on one hand (well, maybe two) the plays, films, concerts I've performed in during the last 6 years. I resigned myself to teaching and working the hours around family. I was able to be a "stay-at-home" Mom, while working part time. We have never had a babysitter or nanny care for our 2 children (other than the occasional night out). I am grateful for the time I've had with them...I know so many women who long to stay home with their children, but can't. However, the nagging of my inner-creative spirit has grown stronger. Some days, I can hardly hear over it's noise! Now, I have never been the conventional sort of anything...sort of a nerd, but not in the conventional sense. Not a conventional actor, nor a conventional mother. The black sheep of my family, you might say. I often choose to go against the grain. I do not eat, clean, teach, or for that matter do most anything in what most would consider typical fashion. So, why a blog? I thought about a journal, but it seemed a bit archaic. Why now? With my youngest heading to preschool and my sanity heading south for the winter, I have become a woman on a mission. I am ready to contribute to the creative world around me, to contribute financially to my family, to FINALLY finish school and move on to accomplish the things I am meant to accomplish. 9 days from now I will be a full time student. I am currently starting a business teaching music and acting to homeschoolers. I will continue to be an active and present Mom. I will begrudgingly continue to cook and clean: ) So, can a mother bring home the bacon, so to speak, and at the same time be there for her children in the way she was as a stay-at-home Mom? Follow my journey and find out!